Faith

First off- all glory and honor through this blog is due to Jesus.  I can do nothing without Him and with Him all things are possible. :)

Our lives seems pretty stable, for the moment anyway.  Yet sometimes the ground we walk on is shaken, broken.  While we can physically see the evidence that we are alive and living, there is an ever-present purpose knocking at our heart's door.  Why are you here?  Why do believe?  Who are you really?  The questions and beckoning that stay just where we hide them.  They are quiet at times.  Then, when the ground beneath you quivers, they scream loudly and beg for attention.  My belief is challenged everyday.  My trust in the Bible, Jesus, the Holy Spirit and all aspects of my faith are shaken from time to time.  Even the disciples had trouble seeing Jesus.  They could touch Him, hear Him, and yet they still questioned.  It takes something more than evidence to hold on to a belief.  In marriage, or any sort of relationship, someone may profess their love or commitment to you.  If it is ever questioned, how can you be sure that you KNOW that person does love you?  What if that person acted rudely to you or hurt your feelings?  Do you still believe the person loves you?  Why?  If you have a feelilng that someone loves you, that feeling may go away under pressure.  If you BELIEVE and trust that someone loves you, you can hold on through tough times.  The same is true with our faith.  I have turned my back on my faith in God countless times.  I have declared my trust in Him, studied the truths laid out in His word and yet still lived as though those words had no effect on me.  I let lies intrude my thinking.  I allowed other's opinions to override my wisdom.  I have willingly let Satan influence the way I talk and behave.  All this while I claim to know Christ.  Why is this?  I don't have that answer.  The Bible, however, does.  The Bible, the living Word of God, tells me the story of how man fell away from the image we were fashioned after.  We have the mark of creation, of God, written all over us.  But the illusion of evil caught our attention.  In our sinful nature, we became prey to the tempting wiles of the Father of Lies.  Is this the end of us?  Does this mean we are hopeless and have no way out?  Our loving creator made a way.  He sent Jesus to bear our burden.  Our faith in Him alone is the answer, the way.  Our works will never make us clean.  Our good deeds will never outshine the work Jesus did on the cross.  How can we truly believe that?  How, with all the other ideas and beliefs and quick fixes, can we truly hold tight to Biblical answers?  There is only one way.  FAITH.  It means to " be sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see" ( Heb 11:1 NIV)  C.S. Lewis says: "We must not encourage in ourselves or others any tendency to work up a subjective state which, if we succeeded, we should describe as "faith", with the idea that this will somehow insure the granting of our prayer.... The state of mind which desperate desire working on a strong imagination can manufacture is not faith in the Christian sense. It is a feat of psychological gymnastics."  We can not make faith work.  We can not do anything to get it.  We must simply, yet at times it feels far from simple, believe.  The above scripture says that we need to be "sure" and "certain".  I'll admit, that is not easy when we have been subject to a world where we are taught to be skeptics.  I am all for freedom. I do not approve of mindless folks following each other nowhere.  That is why I am writing.  I want to share with whoever will read, I have been there.  I find myself there from time to time still.  One thing has changed over the years.  Instead of having questions and just allowing their bottomless pit of despair to overwhelm me, I look for the answers.  I become certain.  I talk to God, read His word and allow the truths I encounter to encourage me.  He always answers.  He may not do it right then.  He may use someone else's life to give me the answer.  He may make me wait for the answer and then give me one I did not really want.  Nevertheless, He always answers. Of this I am sure. There is a song that describes the feeling of searching, looking, trying to find the answer and failing.  But then the song reveals the same truth that I have found.  I have found no better answer to life, love, or purpose.  I choose everday to believe.  When it is hard, I believe.  When it is easy, when people mock me, when I hear other ways that sound good for the moment, when I see lifestyles that appear to be more "fun", when I just want to stop, take a break, give in... I believe.  I believe in the scripture, the God-head, the relationship and the love my Father has given.  He has never let me down.  He has tested me.  He has tried my patience.  He has shaped me.  He has broken my heart and healed it simultaneously.  Always making me better than I was.  He has never forsaken me, and I have always run back to Him when I have doubted.  He is the only answer that has ever made sense.  :)

  I hope that this might encourage you, I hope you might believe- and when your faith is shaken, shake with it on your knees.- Hey that was pretty good, just might have to make that into a song ;)

Your Love by Brandon Heath

I felt it first when I was younger
A strange connection to the light
I tried to satisfy the hunger
I never got it right
I never got it right

So I climbed a mountain and I built an altar
Looked out as far as I could see
And everyday I’m getting older
I’m running outta dreams
I’m running outta dreams

But Your love
Your love
The only the thing that matters is Your love
Your love is all I have to give
Your love is enough to light up the darkness
It’s Your love
Your love
all I ever needed is Your love

You know the effort I have given
And you know exactly what it cost
And though my innocence was taken
Not everything is lost
Not everything is lost nooooo


God Bless YOU!
Heather Michelle

Devotional-Trials

Tuesday, March 08, 2011

"We must through much tribulation enter into the kingdom of God." --Acts 14:22

God's people have their trials. It was never designed by God, when he chose his people, that they should be an untried people.  God- So many people see the Christian life as a way to feel good, to escape reality.  Lord, true followers of Christ know that the trials are many, but the Joy is abounding.   They were chosen in the furnace of affliction; they were never chosen to worldly peace and earthly joy.  I know Lord, that you have peace and joy for me, not of this world, not the fleeting joys of possesions or accomplishments.   Freedom from sickness and the pains of mortality was never promised them; but when their Lord drew up the charter of privileges, he included chastisements amongst the things to which they should inevitably be heirs.  In your chastisment of me, God produce a willing heart.  A heart that will suffer and be glad.   Trials are a part of our lot; they were predestinated for us in Christ's last legacy. So surely as the stars are fashioned by his hands, and their orbits fixed by him, so surely are our trials allotted to us: he has ordained their season and their place, their intensity and the effect they shall have upon us. Good men must never expect to escape troubles; if they do, they will be disappointed, for none of their predecessors have been without them. Mark the patience of Job; remember Abraham, for he had his trials, and by his faith under them, he became the "Father of the faithful."  I desire to have the faith that will surpass my trials, that will prove to last until you return.. God let me remain in you and know that nothing will overcome your power and might.   Note well the biographies of all the patriarchs, prophets, apostles, and martyrs, and you shall discover none of those whom God made vessels of mercy, who were not made to pass through the fire of affliction.  I know that by passing through the fires will be painful, but they will only refine me more.  Lord, with you I know that my trials will come, but they will not take my life.  They will not have power.  God I know that the sufferings will surely strike, but I know that you will not leave me alone.   It is ordained of old that the cross of trouble should be engraved on every vessel of mercy, as the royal mark whereby the King's vessels of honour are distinguished. But although tribulation is thus the path of God's children, they have the comfort of knowing that their Master has traversed it before them; they have his presence and sympathy to cheer them, his grace to support them, and his example to teach them how to endure; and when they reach "the kingdom", it will more than make amends for the "much tribulation" through which they passed to enter it.  Your promise of eternity will spur me on in weakness.  Your suffering for my sake will keep my heart pure.  Your love for me will brighten the darkness and I will press on knowing that your will is done.

My Strengths, My Weaknesses

A few years ago I took a personality and spiritual gifts test/seminar.  It was very insightful and did help me to understand myself better.  I found out what I already knew and then some.  I know that I am a feeler, emotional, think with my heart, and love to encourage.  My spiritual gifts were Exhortation and Teaching.  I did not find much conflict with that idea.  I still to this day believe that to be true.  While I know my gifts and strengths, some very concerning attributes accompany them as well.  I am indecisive, pretty much live in the moment and can't make plans, motivated by others and find it hard to stick with something, ...spaz! I find that dealing with my inconsistencies is quite inconsistent.  I do not know how to completely free myself of my faults, but I do see a way to live with them.  In surrendering myself to God, I find freedom.  I do not have to live up to the expectations of others.  I don't even have to live up to my expectations.  I simply have to let go.  This is extremely difficult for someone like me.  I am by no means an over-achiever, but I do find myself trying to adhere to some rules or guidelines.  God did not give us rules and regulations, instead-Jesus sacrificed His life so that we could continue to live in our flesh.  I am not saying that we should make excuses for our bad habits, but they are part of this world.  We won't fully escape them.  There is a way to overcome them, overcome their hold.  The only way to free ourselves completely is to abide in Christ.  Abiding in His thoughts, His Spirit, His words, His love.  We must be consumed by Him.  His ways must become ours.  This is such a fine line, but we are not saved by works.  Grace alone, through Christ, is our redeemption.  If we are trying to do it on our own, we just won't succeed.  I want to be free from the chains of bondage to this world, I want to be done with my sinful ways, I want to lead others to,instead of distract them from,the cross. I want to love and help and mend and do.. but I must want above all things to be in Christ.. or all those wants and desires are fruitless.  So God, today, please help me surrender.  It's the hardest thing, to lay down, to accept that it's all been done, to not try to do it on my own.. but it's the only way.  Please show me the way, please fix my heart on you, and please be my strength.. No weapons formed against me shall remain! Thank you God.  

Home Sweet Home

God, tonight I sit and think about things.  I remember good times from my childhood.  Innocent times.  I remember learning, yet thinking I knew it all.  Now I feel as if I am starting from scratch.  Your ways are new.  They teach me of a completely counter-intuitive approach to life.  Lord, there were times in my past that I found comfort in things.  Maybe a blanket, a good movie or a cup of warm milk.  Those things now only bring me understanding that the temporary comforts of this world are of little worth.  Why is it God, that we feel so strongly about things?  I have wept over a love story, I shed tears when someone shares their heart with another, at weddings, on facebook, through a hug, definitley in movies.. I cry when I see babies love on moms.  There are countless beautiful moments that are truly a blessing in life.  The birth of a child.  The baptism of loved ones.  The marriage of two in love.  The redeeming power of family bonds. These are all sweet, heart-warming things, but even they will one day fade away.  I find happiness in them, yet I feel a strange homesickness in them as well.  A pit in my stomach forms when I take all the amazing moments in life into view.  I know you made that pit for a purpose.  That sinking, gut-wrenching feeling is there to remind me that this life is not the only life to consider.  Of course you want us to live joy-filled, vigourous and abundant lives, but what if our passion was turned to you?  I am beginning to see how amazing that can be.  I find myself looking to you for comfort.  Instead of the blanket, you surround me.  Instead of the farce portrayed on the tube, I read the stories of your chosen ones.  Instead of the soothing warm milk, I crave the pure spirtual milk that only you can provide.  I am not by any means perfecting this act of putting you first, but God I am craving it.  I am finally seeing the big picture.  The more I seek you, the more I find you.  The more I find you, the more I love you.. in the words of Kari Jobe.  Lord, the tears I've shed for all the love, lack of love, pain, distances, loss and confusion- You have kept them in your hands.  You have been holding them to wash me with.  Can I be a bit dramatic here?  Are my tears the summer rains that come to refresh the earth?  Are my tears the salty sea that I can watch with wonder and awe?  Do you recycle our tears to replenish the world and make it anew?  Even if none of that happens, you are at least holding them in your hands.  You must have extremely large hands.  One thing I remember vividly about my Dad is his hands.  They could hold my hands inside them.  His hands were big and he would always warn me about popping my knuckles, afraid that my hands would someday look like his.  Now my hands fit in the center of my husband's hands.  He can wrap them all the way around my entire fist.  This is the only picture I have of big hands.  God, Father God-  Your hands fit not only my tears, but all your children's tears.  What mighty hands!  One day maybe I will fit my fist in your hand too.  The love and pain of this world can sometimes tear my heart in two.  The injustice, the persecution, the bitterness, the immorality!  God I want to be home in your courts.  I want to see my Dad and hold his hand again.  I want him to meet my husband.  I want to sing praises to you with them both.  I don't want anymore of this cold and harsh world.  But God- I know you are not finished with me yet.  I know that the ones hurting need you.  I know that the mistreated would benefit from your healing.  I know the lost need to be found.  Please steady my heart to resist too much breakage.  It is not whole, but God I don't think it will be until it finds it's home in my heavenly body.  Jesus, be my strength to endure the unpleasantries of this brutal world.  When a tear wants to escape my eyes, may they fall directly into your hands.  If I am confused and scared, God feed me your truth.  When my weaknesses abound, I pray that my trembling hands would be raised to you.  As my knees shake and my heart pound, might I kneel and surrender it all.  I pray that by my voice, your name will be known.  That by my tears, hearts will be healed.  That by my prayers, the lost will be saved.  By your grace, I can be used.  Thank you for this life.  Though there are the times of heartache, for good or for bad, may my heart ever yearn for you.  And when I am blessed beyond measure to witness the good in people and in this life, God that I might praise you for all your greatness. 

To Go It Alone.. Never!

A Devotional from Spurgeon:

Tuesday, March 01, 2011

"He is precious." --1 Peter 2:7

As all the rivers run into the sea, so all delights centre in our Beloved.  How true this is.  Not all roads lead to God, but all delights center on you Oh God.  If anything is good, it is from you. The glances of his eyes outshine the sun: the beauties of his face are fairer than the choicest flowers: no fragrance is like the breath of his mouth.  How sweet and unrelenting are you God, you never fail and always draw us with love. Gems of the mine, and pearls from the sea, are worthless things when measured by his preciousness.  We put worth on things that you made!  How foolish are we.  All of your creation is priceless and beautiful.  Help me Jesus to never put anything above you.  Help me to also see the preciousness of your love and relationship to me.   Peter tells us that Jesus is precious, but he did not and could not tell us how precious, nor could any of us compute the value of God's unspeakable gift. Words cannot set forth the preciousness of the Lord Jesus to his people, nor fully tell how essential he is to their satisfaction and happiness.  God, as Peter could not speak of how unbelievable Jesus' worth was, neither can I.  I only know that my soul yearns for His presence and I am nothing without Him. Sometimes I think I am.  Sometimes I just go through life like it's mine to do whatever I want with.  At times I think my ways are best.  Please forgive me O Lord, I am young in Christ.  Help me to mature and see my dependence.  Believer, have you not found in the midst of plenty a sore famine if your Lord has been absent?   Oh yes I have.  The sun was shining, but Christ had hidden himself, and all the world was black to you; or it was night, and since the bright and morning star was gone, no other star could yield you so much as a ray of light.   I have felt the lonliness, the despair without God.  I have seen the life of meaninglessness.  I have felt the dark overwhelm me.  What a howling wilderness is this world without our Lord! If once he hideth himself from us, withered are the flowers of our garden; our pleasant fruits decay; the birds suspend their songs, and a tempest overturns our hopes.  Please never again.  I desire only to be in your presence.  I hate the moments that I push you away.  I despise those that pull me from you.  I love your truth and desire your light.   All earth's candles cannot make daylight if the Sun of Righteousness be eclipsed. He is the soul of our soul, the light of our light, the life of our life.  I have learned this truth, and God I pray I never forget it in fear, in madness, in despair or in anger.  Help me to draw near to you in times of need.  Cradle me as a child and show me how to depend on you for my life.   Dear reader, what wouldst thou do in the world without him, when thou wakest up and lookest forward to the day's battle?   I would perish.  I would look to other things.  I would crave that which only God can provide and I would waste my energy and love and heart and soul.  What wouldst thou do at night, when thou comest home jaded and weary, if there were no door of fellowship between thee and Christ?  How weary and jaded I can be.  My comforter and redeemer has to be there.  If He were not, I would be utterly lost.  My heart would break and yearn for Him.  What Hell that would be!  Blessed be his name, he will not suffer us to try our lot without him, for Jesus never forsakes his own.  Thank you Jesus.  Oh how I love your wings which protect and keep me.  I love your light and never want to be in the darkness.   Yet, let the thought of what life would be without him enhance his preciousness.  You are so precious, none can compare.  The thought of life without you is enough to revive my heart to worship you even more.  I love you and need you.  Be my King and my life.  For only what is done for you will last!

Devotional- My Home is in God

My words again are in blue and I hope they encourage your walk with our Lord.  God bless you and yours.

Sunday, February 27, 2011

"Thou hast made the Lord, which is my refuge, even the most High, thy habitation." --Psalm 91:9

The Israelites in the wilderness were continually exposed to change.  Aren't we all God?  Don't we see the vanity in our attempts at permanence?  Whenever the pillar stayed its motion, the tents were pitched; but tomorrow, ere the morning sun had risen, the trumpet sounded, the ark was in motion, and the fiery, cloudy pillar was leading the way through the narrow defiles of the mountain, up the hill side, or along the arid waste of the wilderness.  What a site!  I am sure that it was not easy to do this kind of traveling.  God I think sometimes that my wilderness experiences are lonely or frightening, but Lord, thank you for being with me every where I am.   They had scarcely time to rest a little before they heard the sound of "Away! this is not your rest; you must still be onward journeying towards Canaan!" They were never long in one place.  Sometimes I feel like this too.  I feel like I travel and never really find home.  I have lived in so many towns just since High School and have never found a home.  I feel more at home now than I ever have, but if my past is any indicator of the future, it will most likely not last for long.  Even wells and palm trees could not detain them. Yet they had an abiding home in their God, his cloudy pillar was their roof tree, and its flame by night their household fire.  Oh Lord, that I might be as the Israelites!  I pray that I would have my home in you and never want four walls more than I want the four winds!  That I might never desire alluring metals or jewels to adorn my walls, but that I would always want the one pearl of great worth to be none other than you. They must go onward from place to place, continually changing, never having time to settle, and to say, "Now we are secure; in this place we shall dwell." "Yet", says Moses, "though we are always changing, Lord, thou hast been our dwelling place throughout all generations." The Christian knows no change with regard to God.  Thank you Jesus for being the first and the last.  The everlasting God. He may be rich today and poor tomorrow; (Oh God this happens all the time in our country) he may be sickly today and well tomorrow; (This is a scary thought for me and others.  It is hard to see our loved ones become ill or die, please help us continually put our trust in you.  Help us to know you are in control.) he may be in happiness today, tomorrow he may be distressed-- ( I know this feeling all to well.  There have been times where in a matter of hours my entire outlook on life has changed.  I hate this truth because it does not reflect who you are.  Help me God to be ever aware of your control and presence in my life )but there is no change with regard to his relationship to God. If he loved me yesterday, he loves me today. My unmoving mansion of rest is my blessed Lord.  I do not need material wealth or the admiration from others because the one true God loves me and has a paradise awaiting me. Let prospects be blighted; let hopes be blasted; let joy be withered; let mildews destroy everything; I have lost nothing of what I have in God. He is "my strong habitation whereunto I can continually resort." I am a pilgrim in the world, but at home in my God. In the earth I wander, but in God I dwell in a quiet habitation.  I can't speak for everyone, but I know that I have always had a homesickness in my heart.  I have felt that I just don't fit in at times and that one day it will all make sense.  I know that as I wander this earth, it is useless to worry about food or clothing, because my God loves me more than the mere animals, yet He takes care of them wonderfully.  I must set my mind on heavenly things and press onward in my journey and rest in His love.

Talking to God Through Spurgeon's Daily Devo

I thought it might be helpful to some to see a great way to take a devotional ( or you can do it with scripture ) and talk to the Lord through them.  I learned this technique from Beth Moore.  I hope that our hope, faith and relationship with God might be strengthened by sharing together.  My thoughts are in blue :)  With Love-

"Salvation is of the Lord." --Jonah 2:9

Salvation is the work of God. Thank you God for your gift of salvation and thank you that it is left to You alone, because only you are worthy!   It is he alone who quickens the soul "dead in trespasses and sins", and it is he also who maintains the soul in its spiritual life.   Yes God, you surely quicken our souls to long after you and praise be to you for keeping us and growing us into spiritual maturity.  He is both "Alpha and Omega."  The only first and last, beginning and end.  Help me to have understanding and know that your ways are sure and you will return for us.   "Salvation is of the Lord." If I am prayerful, God makes me prayerful; if I have graces, they are God's gifts to me; if I hold on in a consistent life, it is because he upholds me with his hand. I do nothing whatever towards my own preservation, except what God himself first does in me.   How true, how true.  I struggled with this for so long, thinking that I could do it even though I would read your word and know that you said I could not.  Thank you for showing me how very helpless I am without you and how very powerful your spirit is within me.  Whatever I have, all my goodness is of the Lord alone. Wherein I sin, that is my own; but wherein I act rightly, that is of God, wholly and completely.  Help me O God to believe this more and more.   If I have repulsed a spiritual enemy, the Lord's strength nerved my arm. Do I live before men a consecrated life? It is not I, but Christ who liveth in me. Am I sanctified? I did not cleanse myself: God's Holy Spirit sanctifies me.  I could have never cleansed myself, only you Jesus could take away our sins and live again within all your children and give us hope.   Am I weaned from the world? I am weaned by God's chastisements sanctified to my good.  I would surely turn back to my flesh if it were not for your reign in my life.  Humble me Lord and do your will through me.   Do I grow in knowledge? The great Instructor teaches me.   God you give and take away.  My mind cannot conceive all that you do and for that I am thankful.  You alone are God and I pray that I will never again put myself in a position to think I know better than you.  All my jewels were fashioned by heavenly art. I find in God all that I want; but I find in myself nothing but sin and misery.  I am fulfilled by your presence.  When I push you away, my flesh taunts me and wants to ruin me.  You are good and have all my life in your hands.  "He only is my rock and my salvation." Do I feed on the Word? That Word would be no food for me unless the Lord made it food for my soul, and helped me to feed upon it.  Lord, I have read your word before and it was all too much to comprehend.  I tried to be a Christian without Christ and that cannot be.  Lord, show me minute by minute how to abide in you.    Do I live on the manna which comes down from heaven? What is that manna but Jesus Christ himself incarnate, whose body and whose blood I eat and drink?   So many times I have read these words about living on bread alone, and I did have an understanding that of course our souls crave more.  Now Lord Jesus, by your intercession in my life, I know that the bread is you.  I know that you refresh our souls with a spring of water so pure that we can hardly withstand it, yet crave it more intensely than any other thing.  You desire our lives, and we cannot be without yours.  If we live without you, we glorify only ourselves.  Am I continually receiving fresh increase of strength? Where do I gather my might? My help cometh from heaven's hills: without Jesus I can do nothing.  Oh God, there is nothing you aren’t capable of.  You see our weakness as the only entrance into our hearts.  If we live with fullness in ourselves, then what would we need you for?  I have experienced that.  I have said “God I love you and accept you, but I don’t need you.”  I said this not with my mouth, but by my lifestyle.  Lord, forgive me for such arrogance and ignorance.  Thank you for bringing light into my heart and mind.   Be my life and lead me past troubles and straight to your cross.      As a branch cannot bring forth fruit except it abide in the vine, no more can I, except I abide in him. What Jonah learned in the great deep, let me learn this morning in my closet: "Salvation is of the Lord."   Prune me and keep me strong, feed me the life source of your love and produce fruit from me.  Let me not wither in my own strength.  Let me not want to attach to another life source.  You are the true vine!  You are the only vine!!!  Thank you Jesus for saving me from this world, making me victorious over sin and death.  Thank you for giving me new life.  Thank you for your love and mercy.  I pray that you will lead me to the ones I can love and help, just as you have done for me.  Thank you for all you will do.  Salvation of, not only me, but of the world- is yours! Thank you.